🌮 Dave Millar 🌮 @dave@puz.fun

‪Open source af. #indieweb #webdesign #css3 #web2pointoh #fireemoji #hashtagzzzzz ‬

Just put windshield wiper fluid in my car all by myself. Does this mean I'm a masc top now? #lgbtjokes

Woooooooord
RT @alyssaxgnzalez@twitter.com Everyone is so excited for Thanksgiving & Christmas but if you got a broken family, you’d know why this be feeling like the worst time of the year sometimes

🐦🔗: https://twitter.com/alyssaxgnzalez/status/1061876794939334656

New calendar spread... #bulletjournal #bujo #calendar https://www.instagram.com/p/BqGPGAZhD5Y/

New #notebook rollout. Out: Portland @fieldnotesbrand@twitter.com (78 days) In: @zumiez@twitter.com store branded with custom @slushcult@twitter.com screen print. #bulletjournal https://www.instagram.com/p/BqGMC2rhUHY/

Exhausted, emotionally drained, hungry af.

“Can I get a five piece tender combo?”
“SHHHHSHHHSWHAT TWO SIDESSSHHHHHHH??”
“Uh.... inside and outside?”

Still got these little assholes fucking up my basil. #gardening #basil #caterpillar https://www.instagram.com/p/Bp50wg_h762/

Still no momma cat but plenty of stroopwafel liqueur. 😭

Momma cat is missing. I’m fearing the worst.

Hey @netflix@twitter.com what are y’all up to next summer? I was just thinking... Big Brother: A Netflix Original has a nice ring to it... @bbuk@twitter.com @EmmaWillis@twitter.com @Rylan@twitter.com

Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME? I've got a sinus infection and instead of that my immune system is like "c'mon lads let's go fuck up the scalp instead".

LET’S. GO. VOTE! http://www.doomtree.net/2018/11/06/lets-go-vote/

.@tedcruz@twitter.com #ByeBitch #ElectionDay #VoteToday #BetoForSenate

YOU DUMMY YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTER HATES YOU AND WON’T SHED A TEAR UNTIL TWENTY MINUTES FROM NOW WHEN YOU TAKE A LASER BLAST TO THE CHEST TO SAVE HER FROM THE ALIENS YOU DUMB FUCKBOI THIS WHY YOU NEVER SHOULDA HAD KIDS YOU WOULD STILL BE ALIVE IF YOU PULLED OUT AND FINISHED ON THE MOM’S FACE BUT NAH YOU DEAD, DUMB ASS PROTAGONIST I SWEATR GOD

Hey @torani@twitter.com will you send my bar manager friend some free syrup if we promise to get day drunk and come up with cocktail recipes* for you?

* of questionable quality

Toasted sesame? Maybe tahini?
RT @torani@twitter.com We’re coming out with two new flavors! RT and answer with your best guess. We'll randomly choose 5 winners. Hint: it has a sweet toasted aroma. #torani #toraninewflavor

🐦🔗: https://twitter.com/torani/status/1059483011731873792